Troll and quilting #2...

...A somewhat shorter expression of puzzlement and frustration than was the epic #1!

I long ago came to the conclusion there are Some Things Which Troll Is Incapable Of Understanding about my various hobbies, and I suppose I should just accept that and leave the whole issue be. However, there's a little bit of me which has hope and still thinks EITHER he just doesn't WANT to understand (in which case I should just give up trying to explain things) OR he is truly baffled and if I just found the right way to put it, he would have a Road to Damascus experience and stop bugging me asking questions such as 'is it really necessary to get x..?' when x is an absolutely crucial part of a project and he should know this as I've already told him the same thing six times with regard to six previous projects.

The whole incomprehension thing really kicks in with regard to the issue of which materials I need to do a quilt from start to finish... this is a very vexed question which causes endless debate at Chateau Angevin. To the extent at times I'm actually tempted to put together a laminated 'We've been here before and because I can't be bothered repeating myself this is the information you need to know before you start pestering me and asking dumb questions AGAIN' sheet I can just pull out of the drawer and hand over when the time comes... Which it will.... sigh. From my perspective none of this is rocket science, but it seems beyond Troll.

For the ininitiated, and just to check with my readership I'm not going completely mad here and it IS indeed as simple as I think it is, these are the components of a quilt:
1. The 'quilt top'. What most people would recognise as and call 'a patchwork quilt'. This is the bit for which you cut up big pieces of fabric into smaller pieces in various shapes and sew them back together to make patterns. Or if you are an 'art quilter' put together something more random which you can give a pretentious title to give yourself a bit more credibility with your trendy arty mates.
2. The 'wadding' or 'batting'. This is a layer of soft cuddly material, which sits under the quilt top. It can be cotton, wool, silk, even cashmere, but at Chateau Angevin, it is NEVER, ever polyester. This is what makes the finished quilt warm and gives it a padded look.
3. The 'backing'. This is a big piece of fabric you put behind the batting so the batting is entirely covered by the quilt top on one side and the backing on the other. This is the biggest problem element for me, because in the UK there are a pathetically small number of places which do extra wide pieces of material you can use for this.. I usually have to order the things from the States and ask the vendors to think up inventive ways of describing the item in order to fox the muppets at Customs and Excise.

What gives a quilt a 'quilted' look is the fact you stitch through all three layers partly to hold them together securely and partly to give a bit more texture. How you stitch through it is also an interesting problem - you can either do the whole lot on the machine, or layer the three elements in a quilting frame of some sort, which holds them tight so you can hand stitch the quilting stitches. A lot of quilters use the opportunity to stitch in pretty patterns which give the whole project another dimension. When all the quilting stitches have been put in, most people get a big long piece of fabric and sew it all around the raw edges of the three layers to make a nice, finished binding. (In Wales the tradition is just to turn the edges of the top and backing under so you butt them together and stitch them closed, but then, you knew us Welsh HAD to be different, didn't you?).

Now none of that is hard to understand is it? Yet, when faced with these simple facts every time I attempt to clear the expenditure with Troll before I go to the shop or order one of the components online, you would swear I was either talking Vulcan or trying to extract the Meaning of Life from the man. A man, moreover, who managed to blag his way into Cambridge for his first degree and Durham for his masters, so such piddly little things as quilting materials should be a matter of a nanosecond's perusal before comprehension is established. Ohhhh nooooo....

Which leaves me thinking is it just me? Is it just Troll? Do other people have difficulty getting the essentials of their pasttimes over to others, or have trouble making that information stick in the brains of the said others for more than about 5 minutes???